Until I do not feel alone

02/28/2017

It’s the middle of the night. I have reached out.

I do not want to bother anyone.

I see you are online

I don’t want to be alone.

Everyone here is asleep.

Besides the music in my ear keeping me company

Only the thoughts keep running through my head.

Why can you not see how I am hurting?

Can you see that I am not ok?

I reached out. Do you not want me?

Can’t anyone hear me screaming inside.

Its so loud in my own head

My sobs rock my body

I am ok during the day. I feel broken.

Trying not to go back to my devices.

I keep telling myself I am going to make it through this

I just want someone to care enough to see.

See me, want me, hold me.

I am sorry I am broken

I am sorry I am depressed

I am sorry I exist

I can’t leave.

I can’t run

I can’t die.

Little small people depend on me.

Im sorry

So sorry.

Just hold me until the pain is gone. Until I don’t feel alone, until I know you care.